When Words Fail, Music Speaks
by Fourtris loves Newtmas
Summary: A series of Maze Runner one shots based off of songs. Feel free to request songs and pairings.
1. Sledgehammer

**Pairing: Minewt (Minho x Newt)**

 **Song: Sledgehammer by Fifth Harmony**

* * *

 _If you could take my pulse right now_

 _It would feel just like a sledgehammer_

Newt always felt nervous around Minho. He always knew how to send butterflies straight into his stomach.

 _If you could feel my heart beat now_

 _It would hit you like a sledgehammer_

Newt swore up and down that anyone standing within ten feet of him could hear his heart hammering into his chest as he gazed upon his crush.

 _I don't admit it_

Tommy is constantly asking Newt about his crush, but Newt never gives him the satisfaction.

 _I play it cool_

Newt's not the smoothest person in the world, limp and all, but he still manages to contain a little self control whenever he's in the same room as him.

 _But every minute_

 _That I'm with you_

Newt loved spending time with his friends. Especially since it brought him closer to Minho, the boy who was slowly stealing his heart.

 _I feel the fever and I won't lie_

 _I break a sweat_

Newt's hands always seemed to become cold and sweaty whenever he tried to mutter a mere hello to the tall and handsome Asian.

 _My body's telling_

 _All the secrets I ain't told you yet_

Newt yearned to tell Minho how he really felt. But he had to contain himself. Newt couldn't handle another heartbreak.

 _Oh oh_

 _I struggle to contain_

Newt was worried that spending all this alone time with Minho would cause him to let his feelings slip out.

 _Whoa oh_

 _The love that's in my veins_

But Newt was sure of his feelings. He knew that what he felt for Minho, he hadn't felt for anyone else before.

 _Oh oh_

 _And how it circulates_

Newt couldn't help but to blush whenever Minho gave him compliments.

 _Oh oh_

 _If you could take my pulse right now_

 _It would feel just like a sledgehammer_

Newt jumped the first time Minho grabbed for his hand.

 _If you could feel my heart beat now_

 _It would hit you like a sledgehammer_

But then he smiled as he squeezed their joined fingers together in approval.

 _You're taking over the beat of my body_

 _You just don't let up, don't let up_

Minho knew exactly how to drive Newt crazy. And even though they still weren't together, Newt could feel the sparks flying between the two.

 _You're taking over the beat of my body_

Newt loved dancing with Minho. The way he would take control and lead them from one dance into another.

 _But you lift me up, lift me up_

It was like Newt weighted nothing whenever Minho would pick him up and carry him to and from class. But it was okay. Minho always knew how to make Newt's heart soar.

 _If you take my pulse right now_

 _It would feel just like a sledgehammer_

Newt feared his heart would eventually leap out of his chest as he moved closer to Minho's side of the couch

 _So close together_

He could feel Minho's breath on his neck and it sent shivers down his spine.

 _So far apart_

Newt couldn't get enough of Minho. He wanted him closer. He wanted to feel his skin and what it would be like to kiss him for the first time.

 _You're turning me on_

Newt could never think straight around Minho. His sassy smirk alone sent waves of pleasure through his system.

 _And my fire's waitin' for your spark_

Newt leaned in closer to Minho, waiting for their lips to finally connect.

 _Oh oh_

 _I struggle to contain_

Newt waited in anticipation.

 _Whoa oh_

 _The love that's in my veins_

He closed his eyes as the distance was closed between them.

 _Oh oh_

 _And how it circulates_

Newt felt sparks as he moved his lips in sync with Minho's, drowning in his taste.

 _Oh oh_

 _If you could take my pulse right now_

 _It would feel just like a sledgehammer_

Whenever Minho touches Newt, it left sparks of joy up and down his body. It didn't matter if it was a tap on the shoulder, or a friendly hug. It made Newt crave more.

 _If you could feel my heart beat now_

 _It would hit you like a sledgehammer_

Newt was slowly growing more attached to Minho.

 _You're taking over the beat of my body_

 _You just don't let up, don't let up_

He didn't see himself as the jealous type, but Minho was his, and he wanted everybody to know.

 _You're taking over the beat of my body_

 _But you lift me up, lift me up_

And Minho made no complaints when Newt took it upon himself to make the announcement

 _If you take my pulse right now_

 _It would feel just like a sledgehammer_

Minho didn't know just how much of an effect he was having on Newt.

 _The truth is out_

Newt hadn't realized he said it.

 _No stopping now_

But it was too late. The words had already slipped out.

 _I'm getting closer_

But Minho was smiling from ear to ear.

 _I've had enough_

Newt waited. He waited for Minho to say something back.

 _Undress my love_

And then he did.

 _I'm coming over_

"I love you too."

 _If you take my pulse right now_

 _It would feel just like a sledgehammer, oh_

Newt felt a weight lift off his shoulders at the admission.

 _And if you take my pulse right now_

 _It would feel just like a sledgehammer, hammer, oh_

And he smiled as he embraced his lover, vowing to never let him go from this moment on.

 _If you take my pulse_

Newt could feel Minho's heartbeat against his own as they embraced each other tight, never wanting to let go.

 _If you could take my pulse right now_

 _It would feel just like a sledgehammer_

Newt was overly thrilled that Minho returned his feelings for him.

 _If you could feel my heart beat now_

 _It would hit you like a sledgehammer_

He reveled in the feeling of Minho's heartbeat against his chest, pleased to know that he drove Minho just as crazy as he did to Newt.

 _You're taking over the beat of my body_

 _You just don't let up, don't let up_

And from that moment on, they both knew that they would be inseparable.

 _You're taking over the beat of my body_

 _But you lift me up, lift me up_

Minho brought light into Newt's life. He was Newt's support, and he kept him held high, even when he felt down low.

 _If you take my pulse right now_

 _It would feel just like a sledgehammer_

And they knew that no matter what, their hearts would never stop beating for one another.


	2. Why Try

**Pairing: Newt x Alby**

 **Song: Why Try by Ariana Grande**

* * *

 _I've been living with devils and angels, angels, angels_

It was hard living in the Glade with a bunch of boys. High levels of testosterone and trying to work together in peace and harmony wasn't all that it was cracked up to be.

 _Realize you and I are in the same boat, same boat, yeah_

But Alby was different.

 _Kills me, how you love me, then you_

 _Cut me down, I'll do the same_

But Newt was well guarded, just like his leader. He swallowed his emotions and carried on with his daily duties.

 _We been living like angels and devils, devils_

The two could never seem to agree with one another when it came to anything regarding the Glade or the Maze itself.

 _I'm loving the pain_

But Newt never complained or argued. He would always hear Alby out, no matter what the situation.

 _I never wanna live without it_

Newt grew used to this set up. He didn't want it any other way honestly. He looked up to Alby.

 _So why do I try_

Yet, Newt could never figure out why he felt the need to get the approval of the older boy.

 _You drive me insane_

Newt honestly couldn't stand him half the time.

 _Now we're screaming just to see who's louder_

But most of the time he was getting lost in those dark chocolate brown eyes.

 _So why do I try_

Newt tried not to think about it too much.

 _You got me like na na na na_

But his mind often wandered…

 _Na na na na na_

 _Na na na na na_

 _Oooh yeah_

 _You and I redefine being love sick, love sick, love sick_

One minute, the two got along great, the next they couldn't help but to find themselves in yet another heated debate.

 _Through it all you could still make my heart skip, heart skip_

 _Oh yeah_

But Newt's heart always seemed to flutter whenever he was given praise for his hard work.

 _Even when you're yelling at me_

 _I still think you're beautiful_

Newt hated to see Alby upset. But he loved seeing his passionate side come out whenever he spoke deeply of an issue he truly cared about.

 _Through it all you could still make my heart, skip, heart skip_

Newt had no idea what was happening to him, but he liked the feeling.

 _I'm loving the pain_

Newt and Alby have had their share of nasty fights and arguments.

 _I never wanna live without it_

But Newt couldn't see their relationship any other way.

 _So why do I try_

Newt often didn't know why he put up with Alby and all of his "rules".

 _You drive me insane_

They were polar opposites. But Newt could faintly remember something from his past life...something about opposites attracting?

 _Now we're screaming just to see who's louder_

Newt always lost his train of thought around Alby. He was either smiling like an idiot, or yelling to defend his spot as second in command.

 _So why do I try_

But Newt never gave up hope of one day being just like his superior.

 _You got me like na na na na_

 _Na na na na na_

 _Na na na na na_

Newt often daydreamed of Alby in his spare time.

 _Oh baby look at us_

Newt thought about the two of them often.

 _We been living like angels_

He was his best friend.

 _Living like devils_

But he was also his enemy.

 _Oh baby look at us_

Newt just couldn't see it yet.

 _We been living like angels_

Alby was his partner as leaders of the Glade.

 _Living like devils_

Nothing more than someone he took orders from.

 _Oh baby look at us_

But deep down, Newt had faith.

 _We been living like angels_

He knew one day he and Alby would both see the light.

 _Living like devils_

And either drown in it.

 _Oh baby look at us_

Or glow in it.

 _We been living like angels_

He wanted nothing more than to be wrapped up in Alby's tight embrace.

 _Living like devils_

But knew that he would never return the same feelings towards him.

 _Ooh baby look_

But Newt did notice the subtle looks that always seemed to pass between the two teenage boys.

 _I'm loving the pain_

Newt liked the unspoken agreement between the two.

 _I never wanna live without it_

They both knew they had feelings for one another.

 _So why do I try_

It was just so hard to admit it out loud.

 _You drive me insane_

Alby didn't make it easy on him either, with the soft touches and occasional whisper in the ear.

 _Now we're screaming just to see who's louder_

Both held too much pride to come clean to the other. Too held up on who was the more dominant one.

 _So why do I try_

But Newt couldn't deny that he was falling in love.

 _You got me like na na na na_

 _Na na na na na_

 _Na na na na na_

And it was only a matter of time before the truth would come out.


	3. Cop Car

**Pairing: Minho x Teresa**

 **Song: Cop Car by Keith Urban**

* * *

 _We drove right past_

 _That no trespassing sign_

This had partially been Minho's idea. Why Teresa went along with it had escaped Minho completely at first, but now he was starting to see why Teresa seemed so excited.

 _We sat on the tailgate_

 _And watched the planes take off_

This was their first date after all. What better way to spend it than by stargazing out into the night, watching planes take off and land.

 _We thought we had all night_

 _There was no need to rush_

Minho had finally built up the courage to ask Teresa out. He just wanted everything to go perfectly.

 _That's when those cops_

 _Came pulling up_

This was _definitely_ not his vision of perfect.

 _And I thought_

 _Man, ain't this some shhhh_

"Shuck it!" Minho cursed under his breath, sending a panicked look over to Teresa.

 _Your daddy's gonna kill me_

Was what kept replaying through his mind.

 _But if I survive tonight_

If that was even possible at this point.

 _I wouldn't change one thing_

Minho actually smiled at the thought. The adrenaline beginning to rush through his veins.

 _Baby, yeah_

 _I know it sounds crazy_

 _But there was somethin bout the way_

 _The blue lights were shinin_

 _Bringing out the freedom in your eyes_

Minho turned a worried glance towards Teresa and saw nothing but excitement and adventure in those midnight blue eyes.

 _I was too busy watching you_

 _Going wild child_

 _To be worried about going to jail_

Minho became mesmerized in the glow of her beauty as the sirens began to ring louder in his ears.

 _You were thinking that_

 _Running for it_

 _Would make a good story_

"Come on Min!" Teresa yelled over the noise. "We could make it just past those fences!"

 _I was thinking you were crazy as hell_

"What?! Shucking hell Tess, we can't run from the police!"

 _And you were so_

 _Innocent_

What happened to the quiet nerd who sat in my first period science class? Minho thought to himself as he stared in awe.

 _But you were stealing my heart_

Minho couldn't help but to like this side of her.

 _I fell in love in the back of a cop car_

I'm such a hopeless romantic, Minho sighed in thought as he was told to put his hands over his head.

 _Man, they weren't playin_

 _They sure threw those cuffs on quick_

"Hey! I'm cooperating, aren't I?" Minho huffed as he was shoved into the back of the Sheriff car.

 _You tried to sweet talk 'em_

"We're only 16." Teresa tried. "We're sorry. We didn't know any better."

 _They didn't fall for it_

"Watch your head." the police officer ordered.

 _But I did_

"Smooth Tess."

 _You were on the left_

 _I was on the right_

 _I knew you didn't smoke_

 _When you asked him for a light_

 _And I laughed_

 _He got mad and slammed the door_

"Really?" Minho whispered as to not get yelled at anymore than they already were. "What?" Teresa replied with an evil shrug. "Just askin a question."

 _Your daddy's gonna kill me_

"If my brother Thomas doesn't kill you first!" Teresa teased.

 _But if I survive tonight_

 _I wouldn't change one thing_

"Well, if I'm going to die tonight, this is definitely one of the best nights of my life." Minho said sincerely.

 _Baby, yeah_

 _I know it sounds crazy_

 _But there was somethin bout the way_

 _The blue lights were shinin_

 _Bringing out the freedom in your eyes_

"Why are you so happy?" Minho asked, still amused at Teresa's behavior.

 _I was too busy watching you_

 _Going wild child_

 _To be worried about going to jail_

"Are you kidding me? I'm constantly labeled 'the good girl'. Thought it be cool to be 'the bad girl' for once."

 _You were thinking that_

 _Running for it_

 _Would make a good story_

"You know, we could tuck and roll." Teresa said with a wink.

 _I was thinking you were crazy as hell_

"I'm not jumping out of a moving car Teresa!"

 _And you were so_

 _Innocent_

"I will never call you a goody two shoes ever again!" Minho teased.

 _But you were stealing my heart_

"Good. Cuz I really like you."

 _I fell in love in the back of a cop car_

"Me too." Minho smiled.

 _Side by side_

 _And locked in tight_

 _They were taking their time_

 _But we didn't mind_

 _We talked_

 _And we laughed_

 _We sat real close_

 _By the time they let us go_

 _I was already gone_

 _But there was somethin bout the way_

 _The blue lights were shinin_

 _Bringing out the freedom in your eyes_

"This was easily the best date I've ever gone on!" Teresa beamed as she rubbed her wrists. They really did put those handcuffs on tight.

 _I was too busy watching you_

 _Going wild child_

 _To be worried about going to jail_

"At least no charges were pressed, right?" Minho tried to reassure a fuming dad and an overprotective brother.

 _You were thinking that_

 _Running for it_

 _Would make a good story_

"But he talked me out of it! So, he isn't a bad influence Dad." Teresa jumped in.

 _I was thinking you were crazy as hell_

"I swear, nothing like this will _ever_ happen again!" Minho tried to reassure Teresa's family. "Tonight was enough to last a lifetime."

 _And you were so_

 _Innocent_

"I can't be a Daddy's girl forever." Teresa huffed when they were finally done being given lectures.

 _But you were stealing my heart_

"So, does that mean there is another date in our future?" Minho asked, still uncertain after this whole ordeal.

 _I fell in love in the back of a cop car_

"Definitely." Teresa answered, before placing a soft kiss upon Minho's cheek.


	4. This Is How We Do

**A/N: I am so sorry for not updating! I've been so busy and focused on my main story You Belong With Me that everything else was just pushed to the side. Anyways, I am back with a request, so I hope you enjoy this one.**

 **Requested by: smileyface I am**

 **Pairing: Teresa, Brenda, Harriet, and Sonya.**

 **Song: This Is How We Do by Katy Perry**

* * *

 _Slow cooking pancakes for my boy, still up, still fresh as a Daisy_

"Why are we eating pancakes?" Teresa asked with a scrunched up face.

"Why not?" Brenda shrugged.

"It's like two in the morning." Sonya replied groggily.

"Well, I don't know about you guys, but I can eat blueberry pancakes anywhere, anytime." Harriet said cheerfully as she scarfed down her plate of pancakes.

 _Playing ping pong all night long, everything's all neon and hazy_

"Who's up for another round of ping pong after breakfast?" Brenda squealed.

Sonya groaned. "Do we _have_ to?"

"Are you trying to kill us?" Teresa whined. "I need sleep."

"Yeah, and besides, we all know you're just going to win again." Harriet replied.

Brenda rolled her eyes. "You guys are just sore losers."

 _Chanel this, Chanel that, hell yeah_

 _All my girls vintage Chanel baby_

Sonya opened her mouth to comment on their ongoing argument when her phone buzzed with a new notification.

"Ooh, email alert! There's a sale going on today at the mall!"

"We should totally go." the others all replied.

"What's on sale?" Teresa chimed in, sounding pleasant for once.

Sonya scrolled through her email before letting out a squeal of delight. " _Chanel_!"

All the girls squealed in excitement while they began to plan their day of shopping.

 _It's no big deal_

"We'll only be out for a couple of hours." Brenda tried to reason later on that morning after everyone had actually gotten some sleep.

 _it's no big deal_

"Yeah, we'll only stop at a store or two." Sonya chimed in with a head nod.

 _it's no big deal_

"I'm sure we'll be in and out before we know it." Harriet said.

 _This is no big deal_

Teresa sighed. "What could go wrong?"

 _This is how we do, yeah, chilling, laid back_

 _Straight stuntin' yeah we do it like that_

 _This is how we do, do do do do, this is how we do_

What started out as a normal shopping trip turned into a full out shopping spree. No store was missed as they traveled through the store, strategically hitting every store one by one.

 _This is how we do, yeah, chilling, laid back_

 _Straight stuntin' yeah we do it like that_

 _This is how we do, do do do do, this is how we do_

The girls were having a blast, buying new things and flirting with different boys. Each girl carried several different bags on each arm and they were steadily growing. They all wore brightly lit smiles and were having a great time hanging out with one another.

 _Big hoops, and maroon lips, my clique hoppin' in my Maserati_

"What's a shopping trip without accessories?" Brenda asked as they entered into yet _another_ jewelry store.

"But wait!" Sonya shouted as she stood outside the store. "Look at this beautiful car!"

Teresa rolled her eyes. "Every mall has one of those cars you can win."

"Yeah, I mean what are the chances of you even getting it?" Harriet agreed.

"Ssh!" Sonya waved dismissively at them. "Let me just stare at it!"

 _Santa Barbara, chique, at La Super Rica, grabbing tacos, checking out hotties_

"Guys, I love all this shopping, but you have _got_ to feed me!" Harriet whined, rubbing her tummy.

Teresa rolled her eyes. "You ate, like, not even five minutes ago."

"That was just a pretzel!" she whined. "I need _real_ food."

"Let's just go to the food court." Brenda suggested with a shrug.

"Yeah, that way we can still shop, _and_ find cute boys to flirt with." Sonya said with a happy squeal. "Besides, I swear I saw Thomas and his group of friends in here today. No doubt if they are, that's where they will be at."

 _Now we talking astrology, getting our nails did, all Japanese-y_

"I don't like this color." Teresa frowned as she examined her freshly painted sky blue nails.

"Matches your outfit." Brenda acknowledged with a smile while she admired her own hot pink nails.

"I'm not exactly sure why I went with neon green." Sonya chimed in, trying to fix an already smudged finger.

Harriet just shrugged. "Always go with the french tips."

 _Day drinking at the Wildcats, sucking real bad at Mariah Carey-oke_

"I am _not_ going up there." Teresa demanded.

"No way. The three of us are going, so are you!" Brenda forced as she began to drag Teresa on stage.

 _It's no big deal_

Brenda just loved to say this whenever Teresa refused to do something.

 _it's no big deal_

"Yeah, come on Tess." Sonya encouraged. "Besides, Thomas is watching!" she squealed.

 _it's no big deal_

"It won't be _that_ embarrassing." Harriet tried. "There are worst singers out there."

 _This is no big deal_

Teresa sucked in a deep breath. "What else could go wrong?"

 _This is how we do, yeah, chilling, laid back_

 _Straight stuntin' yeah we do it like that_

 _This is how we do, do do do do, this is how we do_

It wasn't horrible, but it wasn't great either. But the crowd applauded nonetheless and the four girls felt really good afterwards. Teresa was blushing madly, but she was happy she was out with her girls and just having a good time.

 _This is how we do, yeah, chilling, laid back_

 _Straight stuntin' yeah we do it like that_

 _This is how we do, do do do do, this is how we do_

When the girls finally decided to leave the mall, they planned on going out for little while longer. Harriet was demanding to be fed again and Sonya just didn't want to go home yet. Brenda suggested going out to a club or something to which the others excitedly agreed.

 _This one goes out to the ladies at breakfast in last night's dress_

"But I'm starving!" Harriet whined.

"I am not going inside to eat blueberry pancakes in my freaking club dress!" Brenda hissed.

"Yeah, you only do that type of stuff on Prom night." Sonya said. "Except, ya know, you go out for dinner, not breakfast. I mean this is just weird."

Teresa sighed. "She's not going to shut up about it until she's fed, let's just go in and get take-out."

 _Uh-huh, I see you_

"I'm _never_ doing that again!" Brenda swore up and down as the four girls exited the restaurant, ignoring any and all catcalls.

 _Yo, this goes out to all you kids that still have their cars at the club valet and it's Tuesday_

"When you going to pick up your car?" Teresa asked, trying to hide her smirk.

Brenda scoffed. "When this hangover goes away."

 _Yo, shout out to all you kids, buying bottle service, with your rent money_

"I'm definitely going to have to work double shifts next week." Brenda sighed as she downed another drink.

Teresa smiled. "Gotta spend money to make money!" she hollered as she downed another one as well.

 _Respect_

"I think you're all drunk." Sonya slurred.

"Totally!" Harriet squealed.

 _This is how we do, yeah, chilling, laid back_

 _Straight stuntin' yeah we do it like that_

 _This is how we do, do do do do, this is how we do_

By now Friday night had blurred into Saturday night and the party was nowhere near ending. The girls were having too much fun and there was still so much to do.

 _This is how we do, yeah, chilling, laid back_

 _Straight stuntin' yeah we do it like that_

 _This is how we do, do do do do, this is how we do_

The girls were exhausted but they refused to end the night early.

 _This is how we do_

"Party on baby!" Sonya shouted in delight.

 _This goes out to all you people going to bed with a ten and waking up with a two_

"You slept with Gally?!" Harriet squealed.

Sonya quickly covered Harriet's mouth with her hand. "Ssh! Shout it out to the whole world why don't you!"

 _Ha, not me_

"Too late." Brenda and Teresa smirked triumphantly.

Sonya rolled her eyes. "I can't be the only one."

Teresa laughed. "I'd pick Thomas over Gally _any day_!"

Brenda nodded in agreement. "And it's obvious I would pick Minho over Gally."

Harriet joined in on the laughter. "Even Alby is a better choice! But thanks for giving us first dibs."

 _This is how we do, yeah, chilling, laid back_

 _Straight stuntin' ya we do it like that_

 _This is how we do, do do do do, this is how we do_

"This was so much fun!" Brenda squealed.

"We should totally do this again next weekend." Harriet said.

"I'm in if you are." Teresa smiled brightly at her friends.

 _What? Wait._

Is what Sonya squeaked in confusion and disappointment.

 _No, no, no, no._

"This is _not_ over yet!" she demanded.

 _Bring the beat back._

"It's only Sunday! There's so much more to be done!"

 _That's right_

The three girls exchanged a look between each other before breaking out into laughter.

"Okay." Brenda said after she was able to control herself again. "What's our next adventure?"

* * *

 **A/N: So sorry this update took so long!**

 **I am still doing requests, I promise!**

 **And reviews are very appreciated.**

 **I will try my best to update again soon. :)**


	5. The Ghost Of You

**A/N: Just a warning, there are spoilers from The Death Cure in this one shot.**

 **Requested by: Artemis loves Gay Ships**

 **Pairing: Newtmas**

 **Song: The Ghost Of You by My Chemical Romance**

* * *

 _I never said I'd lie and wait forever_

After Chuck, Thomas couldn't make any more promises. He promised the little boy to return him back to his parents and he had failed. There was no way he could promise Newt that they would all make it out alive. If he ever brought him down...he wouldn't know what he'd do with himself.

 _If I died, we'd be together_

Minho tried to reason with him, tried to tell Thomas that everything would be okay.

But nothing was okay

Newt was gone and all Thomas wanted to do was see that angelic face one last time.

 _I can't always just forget him_

It's hard living in a place called Paradise when the one thing that means the most to you is gone.

 _But he could try_

Thomas tried everyday to move on and forget. But he couldn't. Someone like newt was impossible to forget.

 _At the end of the world_

 _Or the last thing I see_

 _You are_

Thomas wished he could see Newt again. He wished he could smell him and touch him and just be with him. But now it was impossible. He had lost his best friend, and there was no way he was coming back.

 _Never coming home_

 _Never coming home_

Paradise may have been Thomas' home, but it wasn't Newt's. And as much as he wished that it was different, it was true.

Newt was never coming home.

 _Could I? Should I?_

Thomas often found himself contemplating his life, wondering why it couldn't have been him.

But he knew he couldn't think like that.

Shouldn't think like that.

But he couldn't help it. What was the point of living when the one thing worth living for was already gone?

 _And all the things that you never ever told me_

Thomas wished they would have had more time. There were so many things he hadn't gotten to tell him. So many secrets he was sure Newt would now never be able to share.

 _And all the smiles that are never ever…_

 _Ever..._

Thomas believed what he missed most about Newt wasn't his hair or his beautiful accent. But instead his smile, that could literally light up the world.

His world.

 _Get the feeling that you're never_

 _All alone and I remember now_

At night Thomas often dreamed of him. But it was always short lived. The dreams were never long, always cut short. But Thomas cherished any and all memories he had of his blonde friend.

 _At the top of my lungs in my arms he dies_

But Thomas also had nightmares. Nightmares of Newt begging him. Of Newt and all of his empty threats. The thought of Thomas ever pulling that trigger alone was enough to slowly kill him on the inside, but dreaming it over and over again was almost too much for Thomas.

Having to watch his best friend die in his arms.

That had to be the worst.

 _he dies_

And Thomas can never take it back.

 _At the end of the world_

 _Or the last thing I see_

 _You are_

If the world were to end, Thomas felt as though he would be okay with it. He could finally see his precious Newt again. He wouldn't have to live in suffering anymore.

 _Never coming home_

 _Never coming home_

All Thomas wanted was to have Newt in his arms again.

 _Could I? Should I?_

Thomas didn't want to carry on. Didn't feel like he could. Didn't feel like he should. But he had to. He had to push forward and set an example for the other Gladers. So everyday he faked a happy smile and went on with his everyday life. It pained him, but it was for the best.

 _And all the things that you never ever told me_

Thomas knew he should have told him. Should have told Newt how much he actually cared for him.

How much he loved him.

But the words never came out. He could never find the time.

And now he was doomed to remain in the friend zone because he was too afraid to try.

 _And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me_

That damn smile. It was the only thing that ever made Thomas happy. Whenever he was having a crappy day in the Glade, all Newt had to do was smile and Thomas would feel a million times better.

Even during their scorch trials, Newt was constantly the positive one, giving the rest of them hope.

But now all hope was gone.

The only thing left remaining was that stupid, hauntingly beautiful, smile.

 _Never coming home_

 _Never coming home_

Thomas couldn't stand it. All this negativity. But Newt was really gone. Thomas tried to deny it at first. Told himself that he would come back.

He had to come back.

Newt could come home. Be with his family, the Gladers.

But soon Thomas came to his senses and accepted the facts.

Without Newt, there was no home. There was no paradise.

Only a place where he among with others exist together in one living space.

 _Could I? Should I?_

He still hasn't told Minho the truth. He still believes that Newt is wandering around somewhere like a hopeless crank.

But Thomas couldn't bring himself to tell him. He felt as if he shouldn't, or else he would be hated and misunderstood.

But the truth was that nobody understood.

Only newt did.

 _And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me_

Thomas didn't know what was worse. The physical or the emotional pain. Both were excruciatingly hard to deal with.

His scars would never heal.

His pain will never fade.

He will always remember.

Just as Newt would always have a limp as a reminder of his bad decision, Thomas would always have an empty void inside himself that he can never fill.

 _For all the ghosts that are never gonna catch me_

Could Thomas be forgiven for the wrong he had caused in his life?

He hoped so. It didn't matter if there were such things as a Heaven or a Hell of even just an afterlife. All Thomas knew was if he was ever given an opportunity to be with newt again he would take it in a heartbeat.

 _If I fall_

Thomas

 _If I fall (down)_

Felt

 _At the end of the world_

As if

 _Or the last thing I see_

His world

 _You are_

Was ending.

 _Never coming home_

These three words...

 _Never coming home_

Haunted his mind.

 _Never coming home_

Refusing to leave.

 _Never coming home_

He was never coming home. There was no home. There never was. There never will.

 _And all the things that you never ever told me_

Thomas often wondered if Newt would have returned his feelings. Thomas wasn't one for confrontation. The last thing he wanted was to ruin a perfectly good relationship with the one person he truly trusted with his life.

But now Thomas would never know and it bothered him to no end.

 _And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me_

As Newt faded in his memory, his smile never did. It still remained as bright and brilliant as ever, never losing it's beauty. It was timeless, never aging. That smile was pure perfection and it would never be forgotten. Couldn't be forgotten. It was one of Newt's greatest assets and for that Thomas was grateful.

For he knew when he grew old, memories fading, Newt's smile would forever remain intact in his mind. Even after his beautiful accent was forgotten, Thomas no longer able to even remember the blonde boy with a limp name, his smile would forever be stuck with him for the rest of his life.

 _Never coming home_

 _Never coming home_

Thomas wished he could have made those promises. Promises of returning home to forgotten parents and troubled siblings, waiting for their brother or sister to return back home.

But no one knew.

No one knew that that world had died long ago, no longer existing. But if he could, he would have made it happen. But not just for Newt. For Minho and Chuck and Teresa. Even Gally and Alby and Ben and so many others.

All he wanted was to help the Gladers escape and make it back home.

But they had no home. The Glade was the only true home they knew and now they could never go back.

 _Could I? Should I?_

Could Thomas move on? Should he move on?

The answer was yes.

Newt would have wanted that answer to be yes.

And Thomas knew deep down in his heart that was the truth.

 _And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me_

Time can't heal all wounds,but Thomas was trying to cope the best way he could.

 _For all the ghosts that are never gonna..._

Thomas didn't know if Newt was looking down on him from wherever he was. But a part of him kind of hoped so.

To know that there was a possibility that Newt was watching over him gave, Thomas all the motivation he needed.

All Thomas wanted in life was for Newt to be happy.

And to know that just by living out every single day would make Newt proud, then Thomas was willing to do just that until his time came to reunite with Newt.

 _His Newt_.


End file.
